And so I sit here…

It’s 3:02AM EST time and I’m sitting here watching tv marathons and movies on iTunes and Netflix.  I just finished off a bowl of homemade nachos and guacamole and I’m about to go warm up some more spicy pulled pork I made earlier.  Has this become my life?  This could be the wine talking, or the wandering mind thinking… but this is definitely not where I thought I would be… a year ago, two, three, five, ten? What has happened?

It’s funny how things work. Weight gain made me sad. But I gained weight cuz I’ve been happy. But the weight gain makes me not want to move… so while I eat less, I move less. I’m still not happy with my body. But that could just be my eating disorder talking.  Always in recovery, never fully recovered.

You guys have been with me through so many ups and downs and yet you remain loyal.  So much gratitude.  Love, lust, heartbreaks. Breakdowns and highs. Parties and mournings.

The past year I have been basically mostly living in Taiwan and I’ve forgotten my love for cooking, almost.  I stopped caring a lot about things I used to be so passionate about and I have no real explanation for it… but it’s recently sparked up again.

I cooked duck the other day. And today I had a pulled pork burrito/taco night with pomegranate guacamole, spicy mango pico de gallo with roasted garlic and corn and an extremely spicy salsa verde… along with some yummy gooey blue corn chip nachos.  I started to feel alive again.  I started a cooking idea journal/notebook again…. mainly b/c I was planning to cook for C on his birthday… and while things got in the way, I still got MAD IDEAS to play on.

SO…. I have ideas of doing supper parties.  [And have talked with a chef friend or two about doing pop ups] – I want to, once I move out, host supper/dinner parties, first once a month, and then possibly once a week.  People can BYOB and tell me their diets…. or just leave it up to me.  Hopefully soon after team, up with chefs and cool wine people.

I have so many ambitions and ideas… I want to write, I want to travel, I want to cook, I want to go back to school…. and I want to film it all. I have a secret thing about wanting to be in front of a camera.

So maybe this is how this blog is evolving.  It went from food diary to healthy eating and recipes to eating out and traveling extravagantly …. and then just personal…. me finding my inner peace…. healing and now this.  My lifestyle. Ever evolving.

This blog is now: Finding the real Miss Tiffie.

Please join me in my journey.

New Years Eve Dinner 2016 at Duexave

FINALLY I’m GONNA POST THIS!!!!!!!!!

So I’ve been backlogged… I have half written blogs up all in this shizz and it doesn’t seem to be coming out (ha! – Sorry dirty mind!) I keep having ideas and then writer’s block… my current obsession with watching Frozen and Tangled and seeing their soundtrack 24/7 isn’t helping either… haha “hashtag dork”… and I also started obsessing (yeah a few seasons… like 6, late) with 2 Broke Girl$ (hastag ILOVEMAXSHEISMYHERO) so yeah.  Work, Disney, iTunes is ruining me…. in a wonderful way.

So let’s catch up on 2017… Let’s start off with my last night of it…. NYE 2016 :) which sadly I had a stomach bug so I threw up all night with my date.  Which was funny cuz my date and I went to watch college football first, and me being over-underdressed  puked a few times at the bar.  My stomach finally calmed down on the way to Deuxave (owned and cooked by one of favorite chefs Chef Christopher Coombs) And while I was being careful with my tender tummy… I am NOT about to throw up any good food… I didn’t eat my usual overstuffed way, but all the food was amazing!!!! I haven’t been in forever!!!



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We started off with delicious warm sourdough (great crust and fluffy middle) with a ribboned creamy butter.

Funny story [sidenote] about sourdough bread.  This total bully that lived across the street from me when I was a kid in New Mexico, LOVED sourdough bread. I played with her because 1. She lived across the street from me. 2. She was a bully. 3. She had no friends. 4. I am overly nice even though she did horrible things to me…. etc. etc. ANYWAYS, she loved it, I hated it and she even held it against me. She also forced me to watch Child’s Play which I ran home crying after. I was like 7. Bitch. Her, not me. She also grabbed my arm and bit it once because I said I didn’t want to play with her anymore… #whyineedtherapy [/sidenote]

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Then came the complimentary amuse bouches…. All topped with microgreens!!!…

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Crap, I forgot what these balls were.. they were fried balls of yumminess though… I think it was crab… When in doubt just shove it all in your mouth (ha!) when in a spoon… especially if shaped in little balls (double ha!)

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Some Creamy Lobster Bisque. (HA! The lady next to us even asked for spoons… LOL duh you sip it, it’s a tiny little cup… and if anything just freaking eat your balls and use that spoon… LOLOL.. she complained a lot all night LOLOL!) Anyways.. tasty, thick and rich.

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And some duck liver terrine with pomegranate seeds on cute little crostini…. I could never turn down anything duck liver… or things on a crostini.  I admit it. I love the trend… it shall never grow old… anything on toasted bread (preferably buttery… even more buttery and garlicky) will forever be delicious!!!!!

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For appetizers (thankfully my date was happy to go with my (get two of everything we would eat so we can try more foods) we got the Wagyu Beef Tartare with Forbidden Rice Chips, Green Papaya Salad, Avocado Puree and Crispy Shallots!

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And the Hamachi Crudo with Fennel Dill, Pickled Shallots, Rye Crisps and Smoked Aioli… which is fresh and delicious…. simple and perfect! And gorgeously plated…. and oh oh oh how I love the roe :] Roe roe roe!!!

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And then came the seafood plates!  With Seared Nantucket Bay Scallops with Maitake & Black Trumpet Mushrooms, Brodo, Fines Herbs and a Chili Oil….. hehe I always love when they table side pour for you… I had to whip out the camera in time to catch it in action.

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Look at those beautiful cute things.  Now, date doesn’t do seafood, but he did for me :] And liked it!!!! —- Although he did pass on the hamachi crudo… still need to ease him into sushi…. (bad experience, supposedly)

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And obviously anything with pork belly.. am I right?  Crispy Spanish Octopus(sy) & Pork Belly with Chorizo, Choucroute, Potato, Parsley and Aiji Amarillo.  Octopus on point with crispy ends… and a melt in your mouth pork belly :] NOM!

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And then comes our main courses!!!!! Which contained the highlight of the night… Prime Beef Tenderloin & Perigord Black Truffles with Egg Yolk Raviolo, Celery Root and Bordelaise.

This Raviolo was the dish I was waiting the whole night for, especially since Chef Chris posted the instagram online.  Yeah, you should follow his instagram.  I stalk it religiously for amazing food porn and cute baby pics :]

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Spiced Long Island Duck Breast & Housemade Sausage with Romanesco, Baby Shitake Mushrooms, Foie Gras & Cipollini Vintrigrette and Persimmon.

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Perfectly cooked and I adored the small chunks of all the foie and sausage.  It didn’t overwhelm and the duck was amazing.  You know I’m a duck girl, if there is duck on the menu, I am sure to get it.

We were nearing close to midnight……..

We got complimentary bites nibbles whilst waiting for our desserts…. nervously so, since it was nearing midnight.  They weren’t a hit…. Not to be a party pooper but the other customers around us didn’t seem to enjoy them either…..

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And the desserts came…..

“Cafe Chocolate” with Coffee Biscuit, Cardamom Cremux, Caramelized Vanilla Glace…. Super yummy!!!!!!!!…. I loveeeee cardamom in sweet desserts…!!!!

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And I, being a lover of Chestnuts, I picked “Chestnuts Roasting On an Open Fire” with Chestnut Cream, Vanilla Meringue, Kalamansi and Banana Glace.  The Ice cream was delicious but unfortunately the citrus inside the ball was just way overpowering so I ended up getting no chestnut flavor. :[

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We sipped on glasses of a delicious Rose bubbly the whole night and had such delightful conversations… (I think I might be a bit loud and embarrassing to him) —-and even got to chat with my buddy, Chef Chris for a bit [yes! Hang soon! And I’ll be in for the waffles & foie ASAP]… unfortunately we were rushing to our venue at the W Hotel to countdown to the New Years so I couldn’t squeeze in a pic with him :[ WAA WAA… It’s okay… it’s not like I’m far from this place.  Adore this place!!!!!

 

Wed, July 13 2016: Victory!

Winner Winner Pho for Dinner!  But we’ll get to that in a sec…. but I do see that as a victory as well, since I’ve been craving it for over two months!

Today Archangel Sandalphon is in my life and have told me that “[My prayers have been heard and answered.  Have faith.”  Which is SO on point since a big “victory” I would say has recently happened just right before I left Taiwan.  Which made it a lovely trip back.

A weight has been lifted off my heart and shoulders….. that is until I landed in Boston and saw a certain text.  And then some…. I was filled with rage…. and then just sympathy, compassion, forgiveness.  I called my teacher/mentor last night and she talked to me.  She told me just to relax, breath in, breath out, and do some card readings and pendulum readings to help relax me.  The angels were with me last night/early this morning…. and I was finally able to easily rest at 6am.  Obviously, jet lag had something to do with it – and hunger, but today I feel even lighter than I ever have been before.

I think my heart and spirt…. my soul, has been finally healed and I am completely ready to help others.  The stronger and more calm and happy and loving that I become, the more I want to share it with the world, give, give, give and give.  I feel sorry for those who play victim and just want to take and not give back.

I am closer to God and my spirituality than I have been in a very very long time.  And I am so very happy that this change happened to me.  So yes, I have been victorious in so many ways.  I still have a few things to cross over, but I’m getting there – isn’t there always room for improvement?  Growing?  Being a better person?

It’s very important to always remember that.  Just because you achieve one victory doesn’t mean you stop there, you just keep on aiming for more.

Smile.

Guess who else joined me for dinner?  Yup, Luke got me to try the Pokémon Go craze…. and it seems to be getting to me pretty hard LOLOL…. it’s strange how after all these years, Pokémon are smart enough to still get it to viral status.

 

Love and bless you all. XOXO,

Tiffie

And here’s a little something something from my latest fobby crush, Kris Wu[Wu Yi Fan aka 吴亦凡], whom I noticed he was on the EXO-M, korean/mando pop groups and also now an actor, Canadian/Chinese, which I saw him on the plane on Mr. Six.  Here is bad girl…. omg he’s so not my type but he’s so pretty :] I’ll take it… also his music is……. let’s just say his acting is better ;] LOL.

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I adore him with lots of hair and when he dyed it white <3 <3 <3tumblr_inline_nhevve8SMZ1s3hzf8

Also my other latest crush in the past two and a half months has been Taiwanese actor, Darren Wang [Ta Lu Wang aka 王大陸] from the movie Our Times… who is even further away from my type.  But yes yes yes please.  I’ve actually been having tons of dreams about him lately.
*blush* Should I read my cards with him? LOL…..

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Cuties right? Maybe I will start dating asians again……

“…so what now???”

I was asked this tonight, during dinner. What do I want now?….

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Let’s first talk about what we ate tonight…. we were at The Local, one of my favorites in my area, which I’m sure you have heard me rage about on my facebook, twitter, and probably even on here (although I don’t do quite as many food posts on here anymore)

We started off with the Salt & Pepper Calamari with pickled peppers, ginger salsa, and cilantro…. which was delicious! I kind of wish they didn’t have the sauce on the bottom of the plate though which makes some of it kind of soggy after awhile.  But the plate was HUGE!  They have really upped their portion sizes since they first opened!

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We also had the Roasted Garlic Hummus with “garden vegetables” (today was just carrots and cucumber slices) and grilled pita (which definitely had cardamom in it – which gave it a super “Indian” feel…)  Delicious as usual… just too much EVOO and herbs/garlic in the middle of the hummus, which, I personally stayed clear from.  The hummus was rich, yummy and garlicky enough as it was.

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It was quite tasty…. I love hummus myself, so I was enjoying it like a mofo.  Plus I love carrots and recently found a love again for cucumbers…I think it’s the way they sliced it.

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Then came our entrees.  My lovely lady date got the Herb-Marinated Half Chicken that came with garlic mashed potatoes and over sautéed spinach – which I have had before, so I highly recommended it.  It was loved.  Everything was perfectly seasoned – but, like I said, a HUGE portion.  Seemed a whole lot larger than the last time I got it.

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I was craving beef… and I’ve had the short ribs and the steak tips and the salads with the steak so I noticed they had something new… a Chimichurri Skirt Steak on top of braised kale with steak-cut sweet potato fries.  The steak, while I got it ‘medium rare’ was still cooked medium/medium-well.  Which is why I always ask for things rare to medium rare, or else you’ll just get it well-done and overcooked.

The steak was delicious, as was the chimichurri, though I felt it could’ve been more present – it was pretty…. not “bland” but light. Present, but not really there.  The kale though, tasted overpowering and the salt was just crunching through…. wasn’t my fav.  I stole some spinach from the chicken dish instead.  My dinner date wasn’t too big of a fan of the kale either.  Meh.

[ps. for a nice chimichurri sauce check out Bon Appétit – my fav goto place for inspiration]

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I got a nice Californian Cabernet Sauvignon [Red, duh] which took me forever to sip on. Strangely so. [I’ve been cutting down on my alcohol so it doesn’t take much lately]

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Delicious.

So  now back to the question…. what am I …. wait what?  I think I’m tipsy now.

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Ohhhh so what NOW?!  What now????  After what?  “After taking a chance at love and moving to another country and coming back, so soon after, broken hearted”?  Well, I take that and I continue on. [BTW have you noticed how awesome my hair is? Yay for my new waves/curls]

I can say that I went to another country with full on intentions of nothing but the best… and yes I came home, a bit sad.  I wouldn’t call myself broken.  I’ve been broken so many times, it’s more about who can piece me back together, has the patience to, now, than to say who broke me apart.  How do  you break when you’re already broken?

Am I just damaged goods?

I don’t think so.  I just think that the one who should be with me hasn’t realized it yet.  Or found me yet?! Who knows.  I hope it’s…

… does it even matter who I say, unless it’s mutual?!

So there it is.  A splendid  dinner and a so-so answer to the question asked.

Buenos Noches mis Amores <3

Fairy Tales don’t always have happy endings….

How does one start a story…

And why does anyone have to end one?

Today, I had a delicious al dente [perfectly so] spaghetti dish with tons of mushrooms and truffle [but not overly so as if they had to compensate for something – plus I saw black spots, so it seemed real] and some broccoli [I got them greens in! LOL] Just this cute little cafe, Sugar Cafe, across the street from my – soon to be not-apartment.

I had a heart to heart to one of my close relatives and we talked about a lot. I opened up a lot. I don’t usually do that, my secrets, my horrors, my pains, I like to keep to my own.

I thought that moving to Taiwan would’ve been my re-birth, but it turns out… leaving Taiwan is my true “phoenix moment”

I feel like I’m in some weird reality tv show that isn’t being filmed – but should be. And yet so much I don’t want anyone to know because it is my own private story.  All I can say, is that, things happened which ached hearts and broke trust.  It’s easy to say, but hard to realize.  And while I pray, I’ve prayed so hard, more than I have in the past few years… I have learned to accept it.

So now what? How do I end this story? Tears have been constantly streaming down my face… but I’m accepting it. I AM ACCEPTING IT. This is life. THIS IS LIFE. This is my life. And heart broken more than it ever has been… but I can’t fight anymore.  I thought I was strong but my strength has been used up …. What will be is what will be.

Thank you to my loves for all the support, motivation and love.

My soon-to-be-not-apartment smells like delicious curry that my love made today.  I’m sure I’ll be chewing on that and packing in the morning.  He’s an amazing cook.

And that’s how the post is gonna end. Without a real ending… there is no real ending, there is only the future.

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Vegetarian No Meat Burgers!!!… and other yummies from the past few days!

Today I tried something new… while I had a beef burger…. oh so yummy, I tried out a special recipe for my mom and her vegetarian friend…. no-meat burgers for them using Beyond Meat product! I prefer Yves non-meats but couldn’t find any at Whole Foods today :[ Bummer.

For 2 Burger Patties:
1 bag of Beyond Beef Beefy Crumbles

1/4-1/2 onion
A few cloves of garlic
Paprika
Salt
Black Pepper
Dried Basil (fresh is probably better and if so, minced)
2 eggs
flour

I first sautéed the minced onion and garlic til caramelized and starting to be transparent and browned slightly. I mixed it with the beefy crumbles. Added S&P, paprika, dried basil and perhaps a few more secret ingredients. I added two eggs and a few pinches of flour to help it bind better – I probably should have added more flour since it was a little too wet. And I grilled them.

For toppings I sautéed onions and mushrooms. Topped the patties with cheese as they were about to be done cooking and put a lid on the pan to melt the cheese. I added a few slices of rings of red onion, sliced tomatoes and some avocado. Some other options (which I put on my beef burger) were jalapeños and cilantro.

And to make the dinner even better.. some kale chips… just kale… drizzled in evoo, s&p I added cayenne pepper… or whatever flavorings you want :]

BTW, this was my BEEF burger haha

Sorry, being “healthy”… even tho the burger was rare *MAD COW DISEASE* haha but I ate my in lettuce wrap….”sort of” ok some of it with fork and knife….

More stuff I made this weekend..

Vegetarian Soup… there’s kale, corn, leeks, mushrooms, onion etc etc… topped with some cheese and cilantro and a “garlic bread” croissant

There were more veggies but I don’t remember

And our pre-Masquerade Harvard Ball dinner

Duck Confit with Leek/Mushroom Risotto and Spicy Broccoli

Just used a tiny bit of white truffle butter, topped with parm and scallions in the risotto, had fresh white truffles.. but forgot to top it… duck confit cooked in lots of duck fat for awhile so super crispy… and then just steamed broccoli with hot pepper flakes :]

Duck Breast “Confit” Dinner with delicious sides….. and hilarious Taylor Swift “music video” dance by Miss Tiffie at the end

Poached Cod with Tomato and Saffron and Cauliflower sidedish

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted recipes or food/restaurant things… or anything really at all.. I’ve been having too fabulous of a time having fun, cooking ALL the time with L<3 and having adventures and traveling.  I’ll try to add some posts of some special eats I’ve made, eaten and done recently…. including Taiwan posts!  I’m back!!!!

Ingredients:
SERVINGS: 2
2 tablespoons olive oil
4 cloves garlic thinly sliced
1 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes (or to taste)
1 14.5-oz. can whole peeled tomatoes, drained
¼ cup dry white wine
1/4 cup rice wine
1 cup boiling water
2 bay leaves
pinch of saffron threads
1 fresh rosemary stick
paprika (to taste)
sea salt and white pepper, freshly ground black pepper (to taste)
2 5-oz. skinless cod fillets


Over low-medium heat, add the oil, garlic and hot chili flakes and without adding color to the garlic, just cook until it smells absolutely delicious – about 3-5 minutes.


Afterwards, add in the canned whole unpeeled tomatoes, crushing it while you dump them in.  Don’t add the juice, and make sure not to get splashed by the hot oil.. I  have battle scars.  Then, add the wine, bay leaves and cook it to a boil on high and then turn it back down to medium.  Taste taste taste. Salt and Black/White Pepper to taste.


I took my two fillets and dusted each side with Black Pepper, Paprika.   After placing it in the pan, after a few minutes, I flipped them and added whole rosemary and the rice wine into the pan.  This was basically all to taste.  I also added a little more paprika to the sauce.  Cook until the fish it tender but starting to flake.

Side Dish:


Roasted Cauliflower & Baby Carrots.  I just sprinkled it with fig blamasic vinagrette (or a ny flavor you love), EVOO, Salt and Pepper, Orange Zest and chopped Rosemary… oh and some of my homemade Duck Fat, Shallots and a few finely minced garlic!  Just cook on 450 til your liking.


Put the fish in a shallow bowl, and then pour the sauce over the fish.  Garnish with a bit of rosemary for some green.  Pour some of the wine you cooked with (cuz you never cook with wine you won’t drink) and enjoy!

Btw, i swear the Kimchi recipe is currently in thr works. :] Will be up tonight or tomorrow!

Homemade Buttermilk Fried Chicken & Waffles 1D & 5SOS Concert

It all started with me marinating chicken legs, thighs and breasts in buttermilk, onion, garlic, paprika, cayenne, thai chilies, rosemary and a ton more things…  the next day L came over and first he decided to Lion King Didi…

and yes… I sang the song…

Since the buttermilk marinade was wet enough we didn’t use egg but used a mixture of corn starch, wheat flour and whole wheat panko also mixed with spices like cayenne and paprika.

Deep fried in hot oil while we had some beers to pre-game for the concert

After frying the chicken, we dipped some pickles in the cornstarch and made fried pickle chips

Hot sauce and maple syrup over whole wheat waffles and pickle chips!!!!

And of course with some good beer…

After a shot of tequila, off to the 5 Seconds of Summer and One Direction concert!

I drew on my arm…

L let me write on his arm (even tho his fav 1D is Niall)

I LOVE 5 SECONDS OF SUMMER

Since it was all kids, alcohol lines were short!!!!  After beers we decided on margaritas… double fisting!!!

1D Pride

Everyone was doing it so L made me do a picture with a heart.

Such an amazing concert!!!!!

My First Bday Dinner of the Year

Rum shots for my bday!!! what what?!?!?!

And of course the place chosen was jm Curley since we first bonded over out love of burgers.

My Wasabi Beer

Sadly not much of a wasabi flavor, slight heat on the throat.. but tasty nonetheless..

Complimentary Bacon Fat Popcorn

Bloody Mary Deviled Eggs…
tomato, horseradish, Worcestershire, celery salt, bacon

Mine were awesome but these were pretty good, and VERY much like bloody marys :]

My favorite, and now L and I’s tradition of Fried Pickles
zesty-dill house pickles, creole mayo

And of course…
jmC 9 oz. natural angus burger
cheddar, grilled onions, pickles, pop’s Russian, fries

And speaking of fun.. the next day this happened with K

And after a hot shower, a few beers and some yummy takeout… it ultimately led to what adults do on a Saturday night.