FU

I lol’d

I got two letters for you

One of them is F
The other one is U

Dear Heart,

What are you trying to tell me?  You’re telling me that everything is gonna be okay.  What am I not getting at and seeing?  You’ve been stabbed, manipulated, torn apart, hurt, broken, in love, in pain, everything…. and yet you still keep secrets from me.  Teach me, please, teach me how to listen to what you have to say to me.  I’ve already learned so much from my past, but there is always more things to learn.

Sometimes everyone needs to take a step back and ask themselves what their heart is saying to them and figure out what they truly want.  The truth is there, the future is there.  It will never change, but one sees only what they want to see, but you need to learn how to see what is truly there.

“Love actually is all around” – Love Actually

That’s something we need to learn.  But love can hurt, and it can be happiness. That’s also something we need to learn.  To truly love is to have lost… to be loved and to love others, you need to first fully love yourself.

“Notice how the moon affects your energy and manifestations, and capitalize upon these cycles.”

Things are ever changing… and yet somethings are like Groundhogs Day over and over again. Déjà vu over and over. Today was a great day, Archangel Haniel, thank you for bringing me this.  I have noticed how things I do affect my life in certain ways and it keeps happening over and over again.  There are the negative things and then the positive and I am staying focused on the positive part.

So here I am…. realizing the things in my life that are going on…. and I will continue, conquer and live my life and be happy.

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Before I forget I just want to mention something I saw today…. I pray that this forest fire that was on Mass Pike didn’t do more harm than what I already saw.  The pics do no justice it covered a pretty big chunk by the highway – I’m guessing from the extreme heat (95+) and as we slowly passed it the flames just got bigger and bigger.  Strangely, I saw NO cops, NO fire engines, NADA!  What?  And I saw NO news about it tonight while checking on my phone.  So weird.  Hope the damage wasn’t too bad.

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And now for a little fun.  Because who wants to end a blog post with something scary and negative, right?

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I had a very mother/daughter bonding session today.  With not only my own mother and I, but Didi and I as well.  Pets make people happier, live longer, stay healthier…. you laugh more.  They’re just your own little babies – forever.  And I love my little furbaby.  It’s funny because I have been considering getting some more cats/puppies to give Didi some company.  That or do more work at the shelter I work at.

I was gonna go to a “YappyHour” – get it? GET IT? ^_____^ in town today but it was way too hot for an outdoor event and Didi would totally get sick from the heat.  I drove by the event and saw that it was practically empty. Hello!!!??? Excessive heat caused a forest fire today!  I hope they reschedule because it sounds like fun and great to meet new people.

And remember people…. adopt a rescue animal!  There are tons in need of homes because of many situations, a lot of them bad, so please, open up your heart – it’s a win-win situation!

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Didi and I on our walk in her new stroller… and me catching Pokémon! Hahahahahaha…. WE GOT TO CATCH THEM ALL!!!!!

XOXO

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So hey, let’s be friends! ….

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I’m dying to see how this one ends….

The one thing that my friends have always told me, that despite all the heartaches and heartbreaks I’ve been through I have almost gotten stronger, stood up, and always stayed optimistic.  My cup is always half full and I always stay positive.

Nice to meet you, where you been?
I could show you incredible things
Magic, madness, heaven, sin
. . .
Love’s a game, wanna play?

I’ve got a blank space baby, and I’ll write your name. 

So let’s Marvin Gaye and get it on……xoxo

Safety Pin

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Runaways, we’re the long lost children
Running to the edge of the world
Everybody wants to throw us away
Broken boy meets broken girl
You said you tried it all before
And it only makes it worse
Oh but this time, maybe this time
Two wrongs make it right

We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together
Patching up all the holes until we both feel much better
Deleted things, I really meant, so now I’ll say the things I never sent
We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together

Throwing rocks at your broken window
Only you can cure my sickness
Raise ourselves and a middle finger
Cause they all think we’re twisted
Once I had a little taste
Now I’m addicted to your fix
Oh yeah this time, maybe this time
Two wrongs make it right

We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together
Patching up all the holes until we both feel much better
Deleted things, I really meant, so now I’ll say the things I never sent
We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together

No more waiting, we can save us from falling [x5]
This time, maybe this time

We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together
Patching up all the holes until we both feel much better
Deleted things, I really meant, so now I’ll say the things I never sent
We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together

No more waiting, we can save us from falling

Heart beats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave?
How can I love when I’m afraid to fall?
But watching you stand alone,
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow.

One step closer

I have died every day waiting for you
Darling, don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What’s standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this

One step closer

“Let Her Go”

Well you only need the light when it’s burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
Only know you love her when you let her go
And you let her go

Staring at the bottom of your glass
Hoping one day you’ll make a dream last
But dreams come slow and they go so fast

You see her when you close your eyes
Maybe one day you’ll understand why
Everything you touch surely dies

But you only need the light when it’s burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
Only know you love her when you let her go

Staring at the ceiling in the dark
Same old empty feeling in your heart
‘Cause love comes slow and it goes so fast

Well you see her when you fall asleep
But never to touch and never to keep
‘Cause you loved her too much
And you dived too deep

Well you only need the light when it’s burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
Only know you love her when you let her go

And you let her go (oh, oh, ooh, oh no)
And you let her go (oh, oh, ooh, oh no)
Will you let her go?

‘Cause you only need the light when it’s burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
Only know you love her when you let her go

‘Cause you only need the light when it’s burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
Only know you love her when you let her go

And you let her go

Letting in and Locking out……. You’ll never get me again, I’m just a memory and an aftertaste

I’ve spent a lot of my life hiding from what is good for me or being let down to the ones I actually open up to. When do you go from wanting what you can’t have and being wanted by what you don’t want/need to when you are just happy?  When I open my doors to the right person, I don’t want to be shut out again.  I’m open and speak my mind, but yet there is the introvert in me there’s this secret world in my mind that is hard to bring out. So to all those who have hurt me that I’ve opened up to….

Re-rewind Friday night, never forget it
How you let me go
No more lies I’ll be fine I know where I’m headed
Probably should’ve known

And now you’re gonna say, “Pretty, please forgive me.”
Fool me once, told you twice you’re gonna regret it
Now you’re all alone yeah

Turns out that no one can replace me
I’m permanent, you can’t erase me
I’ll help you remember me
One more kiss is all it takes
I’ll leave you with the memory
And the aftertaste

Close your eyes you can’t hide
Try to forget me but I’m everywhere
I’m the smell on your sheets you weren’t ready
When you left me there

And now you’re gonna say, “Pretty, please forgive me.” Yeah
Bet it hurts, it gets worse, you know nobody, said it would be fair, oh

Turns out that no one can replace me
I’m permanent, you can’t erase me
I’ll help you remember me
One more kiss is all it takes
I’ll leave you with the memory
And the aftertaste

And now there’s something in your way
‘Cause you threw it all to waste
And you wonder if you could take back what you did that day and it hurts, ’cause…

Turns out that no one can replace me
I’m permanent, you can’t erase me
I’ll help you remember me
One more kiss is all it takes
I’ll leave you with the memory
And the aftertaste

Truth is that no one can replace me
I’m permanent, you can’t erase me
I’ll help you remember me
One more kiss is all it takes
I’ll leave you with the memory
And the aftertaste
And the aftertaste

I want to get back into poetry and lyric writing….

I used to do a lot of poetry and lyric writing. Anyone looking for lyric writers for their music?  I started humming a tune to this song… just need someone able to compose music better than me to help me out.

I want you here beside me.
I never felt this way before…
I can’t get you off of my mind.
And it makes me go insane.

I don’t know what I’m doing.
And why I feel this way.
I never act this way… ever… never… ever…
Just wish you felt the same.

Give me you.
And take all of me in…
I’ll be forever yours, in each and every way.

Just be you… a New Chapter in Life

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight,
Not a footprint to be seen.
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I’m the queen.
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside.
Couldn’t keep it in, Heaven knows I tried.

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see,
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know.
Well, now they know.

It’s funny how some distance makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me can’t get to me at all.
Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe.
I know I left a life behind but I’m too relieved to grieve.

Standing frozen
In the life I’ve chosen.
You won’t find me.
The past is all behind me
Buried in the snow.

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand, and here I’ll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway